A Work in Progress….

Matt 8:24 Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.
Last night, at the end of a meeting at church, I asked for continued prayers as my guys prepare for their upcoming AT journey. It is an incredibly exciting time, but I realized, as emotion choked my voice during the request, that I still have a lot of fears about all the uncertainties. When my sweet Savior put Matthew 8 in my path this morning, I immediately saw the parallels. I feel like I am sitting in a rickety rowboat in the middle of an enormous sea, watching ominous storm clouds gather in the distance. My fear is not based on fact. It is based solely on what “could” happen. Jesus, help me.
Matt 8:25 The disciples went and woke Him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”
It feels a bit like being trapped in a tv broadcast before a bad storm—snow storm, tropical storm, you name it. Stations all treat them the same. They talk ad nauseam about what could happen, what might happen, what happened in the past, but they are not God. They don’t know what will happen. And Jesus is napping in my boat, totally unconcerned about the storm—not because He doesn’t care but because He knows that His Father, our Father, is in control. He is resting in perfect peace instead of panicking in fear. Jesus, help me.
Matt 8:26a He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?”
Lord, Thank You for this day and for the truths that You have laid on my heart. Thank You for helping me gain some much needed perspective when it comes to my fears. Thank You for the amazing opportunity of this hike. Draw my family closer to You and to each other as we continue to prepare. Help me, specifically, to trust and not to fear. Wrap me in Your peace. Amen.
Matt 8:26b Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.
Have a blessed day.

James 2:1 My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism.
Google defines favoritism as “the practice of giving unfair treatment to one person or group at the expense of another.” 1 Samuel 16:7 reminds us that “The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” But if I am really honest with myself, despite all my knowledge that it is the wrong thing to do, I’m still guilty of showing favoritism and bias, of not giving everyone a fair shake. I think the tendency to do so is a very real part of our earthly struggle. Jesus, Help me.
James 2:5 …Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom He promised those who love Him?
It is even harder not to continue to judge someone who has hurt me in the past. Christ wiped my slate clean, removed my sins as far as the east is from the west, remembers my sins no more. And yet, I am often guilty of retaining a hardness of heart due to past hurts and transgressions. I am guilty at times of not wiping the slate clean, of not allowing a fresh, unblemished start for others. Jesus, Help me.
James 2:8 If you really want to keep the royal law found in Scripture, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing it right.
Lord, Thank You for this day and our time together this morning. Thank You for showing me an area You want me to work on. Thank You for Your love and mercy, for wiping my slate clean, for giving me a fresh start. Help me, Jesus, to treat others, all others, as You treat me. Draw me closer. Amen.
James 2:13 …judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment.
Have a blessed day.

Even 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
I woke up with a raging headache, and it hasn’t gotten any better. I’m pretty sure it is related to atmospheric pressure and weather systems, but it is definitely hindering my ability to see to beauty in this morning. Interestingly, instead of giving in to the misery, this feeling has sent me to God’s feet to ask how I can live a life that honors Him even when I feel like I currently do. 
Matt 7:7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”
When I decided at the end of last year to get 11,000 steps a day, I began looking more closely at each decision I make. I realized early on that in order to make the goal attainable, I had to build in steps during the day—not mindless, pacing steps, but intentional steps that help me accomplish what needed to get done but also helped me to move more. It occurred to me this morning that I need to approach my desire to honor Christ with my life in a similar manner. If I’m going to do it, I have to be able to perceive it as sustainable, which means, I have to become more mindful in each moment about how I can do the many daily things that must be done in a way that honors Him at the same time. The concept is simple, but the results could be revolutionary.
Matt 7:8 “For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”
Lord, Thank You for this day and this perspective. Thank You that instead of just being grumpy with my headache, I came to You seeking advice. Thank You for the wisdom and insight of my time with You this morning. Help me, moment by moment, to be intentional about honoring You with my attitude, my choices, my life. Draw me closer. Amen.
Ecc 3:22 He has made everything beautiful in its time….
Have a blessed day.

Gen 18:14 Is anything too hard for the LORD?
There is a saying I’ve seen on the internet: “If you think you’ve blown God’s plan for your life, rest in this. You, my beautiful friend, are not that powerful.” I love the message behind both the verse and the saying. God is all powerful. I am infinitely human. I may be able to mess up in an astounding number of ways, but I am not so powerful that I can screw up beyond His reach or redemption. Thank You, Jesus. But here’s the question that gives me pause. Do I live my life in a way that reflects, truly reflects, my belief that NOTHING is too hard for the Lord? Jesus, Help me.
Exodus 14:14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only be still.
I have always interpreted this verse as meaning that the LORD will fight on my behalf, but last night as I pondered it, I wondered about another interpretation: The LORD will fight for me to become the person He designed me to be, the person He knows I can be, my best self, rooted in Him. In that light, Romans 8:28, And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him…., takes on an entirely different nuance. I’m definitely going to have to study this idea further.
Luke 1:37 “For nothing is impossible with God.”
Lord, Thank You for this day and for these thoughts. Thank You for this renewed desire to live a life that honors You. Thank You that nothing is too difficult for You, that Your thoughts are nothing like my thoughts, that Your ways are beyond anything I can imagine (Isaiah 55:8). Draw me closer with every breath, Lord. Amen.
Job 42:2 “I know that You can do all things and that no plan of Yours can be thwarted.”
Have a blessed day.

1 Samuel 3:10 …Samuel said, “Speak, for Your servant is listening.”
A friend shared a devotional that compared God’s work in our lives, within our persons, with a home renovation. I never thought of it that way before, but it seems so incredibly fitting. I so sincerely feel God is calling me to examine areas of my life that need renovation—my anger and bitterness, my need for control. But while the results of renovations are amazing, I am not a fan of the chaos of construction.
2 Tim 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear…but of power, love, and self-discipline.
God has not given me a spirit of fear, but He does give me a choice. He will gladly renovate my interior life, but only if I allow it. He has a beautiful vision for my internal landscape. His artist’s eye sees it clearly. But He will not move forward without my permission. Lord Jesus, help me.
Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Lord, Thank You for this day and for Your deep and abiding love for me. Thank You for the vision You see so clearly for my life.  I want to live a life that honors You, Lord. I know that interior renovation must happen for that life to fully manifest itself. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t more than a little apprehensive about the process of rooting out old ways, habits, and defaults. But You did not give me a spirit of fear, and You aren’t asking me to do it alone. Guard me. Guide me. Draw me closer. Help me to hope and trust and not to fear. Help me to live a life that honors You. Amen.
James 1:4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Have a blessed day.

Eph 5:15 Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise….
I want to live a life that honors Christ. Approaching this goal with renewed purpose has given me new eyes, a new perspective. He has made it abundantly clear that I must deal with my anger and bitterness. Those emotions cannot coincide with the peace of Christ, which I want so very much in my life. Yesterday I wondered if pride may not be at the root of my feelings, at least in part. Google defines pride as “a feeling or deep pleasure or satisfaction derived from one’s own achievements.” What strikes me so with this definition is the utter absence of Christ. 
Luke 1:78 …because of the tender mercy of our God, but which the rising sun will come to us from heaven….
Pride is all about me—my achievements, my actions, how I am perceived by others. If I am to truly live a life that honors Christ, I must get the prideful, worldly side of myself in check. Perhaps, as I examine my anger and bitterness, I need to ask myself is the issue about me or Him. If it is about me, that’s pride, and that has to be acknowledged, forgiven, and released. It sounds so simple in theory, but I know the implementation of it will not be as easy. 
Luke 1:79 …to shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace.
Lord, Thank You for this day and for these verses. Help me to look at the anger and bitterness in my life through Your eyes and Your grace. When I am focused on nursing my own grudges, I do not have the time, energy, or resources to be of use to You. When my pride is the root of my offense, help me to acknowledge, forgive, and release it so that I can be of use to You. Help me to deal with and release this anger and bitterness, Lord, because I know I cannot truly live a life that honors You when I am so consumed by myself. Draw me closer. Give me strength. Amen.
2 Cor 12:9 But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”…
Have a blessed day. 

Acts 8:23 “For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.”
Lord, I want to live a life that honors You. I know from the verses You are placing in my path and the way I’ve been feeling lately that You want me to deal with the anger and bitterness in my life, but I’m going to need Your help. First, I’m not even sure I know the source of these emotions. Help me root it out so that I can deal with it. Second, anger has become like a second skin, an awful protective layer around me. I do not want that, Lord, but I’m going to need help changing. Jesus, help me.
Eph 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
I can’t help but wonder if pride is at the root of this issue. Is it that I feel I’ve been offended? Maligned? You were unjustly crucified on the cross, yet You still prayed for Your oppressors—as You were dying and they were casting lots for Your clothes. Any offense I may have suffered pales in comparison, yet I can’t even figure out the source of my anger, much less how to let it go. Jesus, help me.
Psalm 37:8 Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper—it only leads to harm.
Lord, Thank You for this day and for bringing this issue to the surface. I know that in order to live a life that honors You, I need to be gentle and humble, like You. I need to give up anger and bitterness. I also know that I cannot do this without Your help. Guide me. Guard me. Humble me. Help me let it all go. Clothe me with Your peace. Amen.
Eph 5:15 Be careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise….
Have a blessed day.

Isaiah 43:18 Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
In an effort to be more active, I am trying to get in 11,000 steps every day. I realized early on that in order to integrate 11,000 steps into my day, I have to be purposeful—take the long way to where I’m headed, make an extra trip out of my classroom. An unintended consequence is that I am spending more time around people instead of isolated in my room, and that opportunity for human contact is uplifting. Yet every day I start again at 0 steps. I can’t rest on yesterday’s number if my goal is to reach 11,000 steps today.
Isaiah 43:19a See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
My desire to live a life that honors Christ works similarly in many ways. If I want Him to be an honored part of my life, I have I look for little ways I can incorporate Him throughout my day, seek opportunities that may not be directly in my line of focus. And every day, I begin again, with a clean slate and a desire to honor Him. Some mornings, I’m already exhausted, but what He wants is for me to be eager—how can I honor Him today? How can I glorify Him? How can I seek Him? I know that by seeking Him more, I will see Him more throughout my day. What a blessing!
Isaiah 43:19b I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
Lord, Thank You for this day and for these insights. I want to honor You. I want to seek ways to make You a larger part of who I am. Help me to eagerly seek You and seek ways to honor You, each and every day. Draw me closer. Amen.
Lam 3:22-23 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning….
Have a blessed day.

Phil 4:11 …I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
I am a planner, and part of that is being prepared for any possible scenario. Obviously, it is impossible to be prepared for every single contingency, but I do my best. I’ve always prided myself on this trait, but today’s verses show it clearly as a massive stumbling block to a life that honors Christ.
Phil 4:12a I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. 
So now I’m left wondering how to achieve balance in this area. I definitely trust Christ to provide for my needs, but I certainly don’t want to go into a situation without basic preparation. That seems foolhardy and wasteful. I don’t want Christ to take care of me because I don’t take care of myself. I don’t think that’s what He ever had in mind. I want to be prepared, but I also want to be unafraid. Life often doesn’t go according to plan, and living a life that honors Him means living confidently, knowing that He will supply my needs, no matter the situation.
Phil 4:12b I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
Lord, Thank You for this day and for bringing this matter to my attention. I recognize that this is an area I need to give to You. Help me to understand how to trust You with the unknowns while still being as prepared as I can be. Help my desire to be prepared to come from a place of confidence in doing my best and not from a place of fear of being without. Help me to live a life that honors You in every way. Draw me closer. Amen.
Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
Have a blessed day.

Col 3:17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
My focus this year is on living a life that honors my Savior. I think that is a beautiful life-goal, and I’m wrapping my head around what that means exactly. One of the truths He has shown me of late is there’s still too much of me in me. 
Col 3:15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts….And be thankful.
If I am going to honor Him, then I need to get out of His way so He can use me, work in me and through me for the good of His people. But I am still so quick to react in anger, bitterness, fear. Those are my frail, human emotions, not the peace, trust, and obedience of Christ in my life. Jesus, Help me.
Col 3:14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in prefect harmony.
Lord, Thank You for this day and this deep desire to honor You with my life. Thank You for the realization that there is still so much earthliness in me, which keeps You from being able to fully use me for Your purposes. Help me to navigate both the earthly and eternal and to strike a balance that allows me to honor You in every way. Draw me closer. Amen.
Col 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly….with thankfulness in your hearts to God.
Have a blessed day.